A Second Life Begins

Shortly after midnight, in the early morning hours of Tuesday, December 13, 2011, a new phase of my life began. It is nearing two a.m. and I’m unlikely to sleep tonight. In fact, it feels as though I might even be holding my breath well into the morning’s light. My debut novel – Harvest of the Heart – has been released. The world (or as much of it as I can reach) will soon begin to judge whether I have a future as an author. Talk about gut-wrenching… this is worse than the night before the state championship meet when I was coaching high school track.

I might be calling this a “soft” release, but it feels hard to me. While most of the people who I hope will buy my book are probably still sleeping, I’m reviewing in my mind all the steps I’ve taken, and have yet to take, in my publishing journey. All you writing veterans out there will read this post and chuckle. You’ve been there, done that. But this is my first time. I’m as nervous as any virgin bride (or bridegroom) on their wedding night. What will tomorrow bring? A joy-filled, endless honeymoon? Or something else?

There will be highs such as this: a few minutes ago, I got my first e-mail from PayPal telling me that Diane V. had purchased an autographed copy of my book. The first one. My wife is already in bed and I hope my fist pump and exultant “YES!” didn’t wake her. And I’m certain there will be lows, too. Dips in sales, rejections from some brick and mortar bookstores who shy away from self-published authors… signings where I sit self-consciously waiting for at least one person to come up and talk to me.

Don’t worry, I’m determined to see this through. My muse demands nothing less. By the end of 2012, I intend to have at least three more books released. I’ll be an old hand by then. Maybe not a grizzled veteran on the literary scene, but at least not a greenhorn, a newbie holding his breath, waiting for someone to say “yes, you have what it takes… you ARE going to make it.”

Jealousy sneaks in

Jealousy is not at all low, but it catches us humbled and bowed down, at first sight. – Colette

My mind is all a jumble. Amid the frenzy of the approaching release of “Harvest of the Heart”, I struggle with a confidence that sometimes falters. Like a stubborn leak in the roof which no amount of patching can fix,  doubt and insecurity are drip, drip, dripping in the background of my public confidence; eroding the euphoria that should grace the atmosphere around an author on the verge of publication.

The doubts don’t attach to my writing. As I grow closer to seeing them exposed to the public, the confidence I have in my abilities has grown. I look critically at my own work and compare it to that of many “best-selling” authors… and I firmly believe the comparison is favorable.

At the top of my iGoogle home page this morning was a single line of text; an advertisement for a novel. Supposedly some algorithm selected this particular ad based on my browsing and e-mails. (I’m not one of those too concerned about my privacy. I’m about to ask the world to buy my book, I want to be noticed.) I clicked the link and found a book that was released in August. It is self-published. The author is someone with a lot of money, an idea, a marketing plan and a modicum of talent. I read the sample of the book and was not impressed. It wasn’t bad, it just felt as if it was written by a person who took a class on how to put words on paper. This was not a man who has been driven his entire life by a muse that poked and prodded and jabbed until he became a writer.

And so jealousy reared its ugly head. This author has – for his book – things that I want for mine: a Type-A personality driving it to market; a classy, custom website with all the bells and whistles; advertisements across the internet that seek out responsive readers; and the financial backing that opens doors.

Jealousy only adds to my doubt about the chances “Harvest of the Heart” has to find its market; that dripping threatens to become a steady stream. A lot is riding on my book at least showing the potential for success. I’ve done the best I can in a short period to position it to start well. But much of my strategy relies on social media to help create early momentum. I don’t have the money for a publicist to create ads, send out effective press releases, to garner reviews for a self-published author, to whisper in the right people’s ears. The learning curve to do all this myself is steep. The time to do it is hard to find and my muse is angry that I haven’t been writing much while I try to get this book launched.

This morning, I was indeed “humbled and bowed down” by jealousy. But that first sight did not last. The hour I spent with my grandson in my arms restored my spirits. Within days, I will have the proof in my hand. I tell myself that the quality of the book and the marketing efforts I am making will result in success.

The frenzy continues and the fateful day is nigh. Breath, Michael! Breath!

There is no mystery to marketing

There have been a lot of blog posts from new or indie authors begging for the “inside scoop” on how to market their books. For a while, I was searching  for it too – that one magic key that would unlock the glaring spotlight of publicity for the release of my debut novel “Harvest of the Heart”. Within the first hour of combing the web, I discovered that there is no such thing as a magic key. After that failure, I kept searching for the easiest, most efficient and guaranteed reliable book marketing method. It has taken me many more hours to find out that doesn’t exist either. None of the marketing methods out there are magic; none are easy; none are guaranteed. If you have a lot of money to burn, there are certainly a boatload of marketing gurus and websites more than happy to take it. I haven’t found one that will guarantee your book’s success. or any level of success at all.

It isn’t that some aren’t good. It is just that they are in the business of making money regardless of whether you make any or not. I’d love to see a marketer that was willing to go out on a limb and say, “I love your book. I’m certain it will be a success. Instead of charging you upfront, I’ll take 10% of the royalties up to my fee.” I’d be willing to pay a marketer/publicist like that double their usual fee, just to see them tied to the success of my book.

Since- A) such a marketer doesn’t exist, and B) I don’t have the money to pay a marketer, I am wading through this marketing morass on my own. Valuable nuggets have been gleaned from discussion forums and OPBs (other people’s blogs). Carefully studying the information available from Amazon, CreateSpace and various marketers has yielded a lot of useful advice.

Blogging, Facebooking, Tweeting, Networking, Goodreads, BookBuzzr the list goes on and on. They all take time away from my writing, but it seems I don’t have much choice if I want people to buy my book when it comes out in December. Time to pull on my boots and keep on wading.

Something I’ve learned

Image via Wikipedia

I’ve begun following a lot of discussions and blogs by and for new authors. I’m new myself and don’t have a wealth of experience to draw from, but I do have what I believe is a valuable piece of advice: If you have been searching for an agent, don’t let your eagerness and excitement at such a prospect get the best of you. That excitement should not lead you into jumping at the first agent that dangles a contract. Make sure the agent is a good fit, for you and your work. Give the agent the same level of scrutiny that he/she is going to give your manuscript. Once you’ve done this, don’t ignore any warning signs that indicate a particular agent may not be the best for your book. I learned the hard way that all agents and all publishers are not created equal.

If circumstances had not developed the way they did, I would not have learned so much over the past six weeks. The emotional roller-coaster I was on from the beginning of summer into the fall is now climbing steadily. I expect there will be a few more dips ahead, but I don’t regret one bit the decisions I made.  I could have spent months and years submitting my manuscript to traditional publishers. It may never end up on the bookshelf of big retailer.

Instead, my book will be in my hands, and the hands of readers, in only a few more weeks. I may not strike it rich by self-publishing, but it will be fulfilling and rewarding all the same.